SHE'S A STEP-UP TRANSFORMER

WHO AM I?
    She's a step-up transformer. She has built-in emotional circuitry which re-directs all the positive and negative energy in a party, meeting or social gathering. She enters and all heads turn her way.  Like good little magnets - we can't help ourselves. Maybe it's her laugh, or her smile, like effervescent emotional glitter, we are attracted.
    People want to touch her, greet her, hug her, seek her recognition. She has to make her way into the room, shaking hands, kissing cheeks, patting shoulders. She is used to working her way through crowds. It has taught her patience. She seems to have something people want. It's as if she were eight feet tall or weighed 350 pounds - there is simply MORE to her than other people. Maybe it's knowledge, experiences, or ideas. People have questions for her and want to talk with her.
    She may move in a sensual way. Her energy could be called "animal magnetism" and it can come across as sexual. It causes a tension between herself and others of the opposite sex.

WHY AM I HERE?
    She comes to parties and gatherings as much to receive as to give. She is not the source of energy, she needs energy from others. Without them, she is powerless. What good is "animal magnetism" without an opposite animal to be attracted?
    The tension between the attraction.of opposites and resistance or opposition affects most relationships.  How do we get close without merging?  How do we maintain our independence without flying away. "Engagement" is a give-and-take thing - and sometimes the step-up transformer is not the best for the delicate balance required. If her orientation is "step-up" then "step down" may be difficult.
    And, one of the things essential for transformers is some kind of feed-back loop. I had an Aunt who was a step-up person but in her case, she wasn't aware of how she was coming across. Many of us fled when she started raising the volume.
    Some step-up transformers have greater capacity for change than others. There are lots of important capacities to have: when to turn it up, when to turn it down, when to turn it off. Sensitivities.  What she is able to transform or add to depends upon her in-built capabilities, and of course, love.  Some step-up transformers tend to amplify the things they love. But, she can ruin the possibility of love by coming on too strong - that shuts down the other person who suddenly doesn't want to give ANYTHING to her.

WHAT DO I WANT?
    When you are one-on-one with her, there is something about her eyes and how she looks at you - that looks INTO you. And, when she looks into you, you feel good and she seems to be nourished in someway by the interaction.  Her smile fills you with joy, but your receiving her smile in a joyful fashion warms her heart and she is grateful when that happens.
    Step up transformers love to find occasions when they can simply be themselves and others let them expand, add power to and inflate everything in their world. But, this, in the long-run, is unsustainable. The step-up person gets exhausted. What they lack is grounding.
    The grounded circuit discharges energy through itself. That's where you and I come in. We provide the grounding so the energy discharges through us. It is possible to develop the capacity help the step-up person step-down and guide them to equanimity. But, grabbing the live-wire transformer when the power is high can be shocking, an emotional zap which can fry you. The key is to engage not at the height of energy, but little by little over time so energy is discharged gradually.

(c) Copyright 2014, Jean W. Yeager
All Rights Reserved

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